Cheating to your partner may definitely ruin every rule in your relationship together with the issue of trust. Coming to terms with the betrayal and hurt is often too much for the injured party and so the relationship ends. If you are the guilty party and want to work towards reconciliation with your partner there is much you need to consider first. It is not impossible for a relationship to recover from a person’s infidelity; however this will take time as well as effort from both of you.
Stop all contact with the other person. If you are serious about winning back your partner than you need to sever all ties with the person with whom you cheated. If you do not feel you can stop contact or want to remain friends with this person you need to consider how serious you are about wanting your partner back.
Take responsibility and apologize for your actions. It is important if you want to reconcile your relationship that you admit you were in the wrong. Do not accuse or blame your partner, the only person responsible for your action is you. Be sincere when making your apology, they may not want to listen if they is still in shock so give it time. Eventually they will appreciate the fact you had the courage to admit your wrongdoings.
Arrange a time you can talk to each other. This is an opportunity to get things out in the air not to force the issue of reconciliation. It can take a long time for a person to come to terms with infidelity; until they do they cannot entertain the idea of restarting your relationship.
Be honest when you do talk to your partner. Resist the temptation to lie about what happened, either to protect yourself or as a misguided attempt at protecting them from the truth. He will know you well enough to tell when you are lying, thus making things worse for you. Think about what you are going to say and how best to say it before talking to your partner.
Answer their questions. Be prepared to answer lots of awkward questions honestly. The secrecy behind an affair is what causes the most damage to a relationship. Even after reconciliation, you will have to accept she may well ask questions for a long time to come.
Show compassion. Unless you have experienced infidelity for yourself you have no way of knowing how your partner feels. Show kindness and accept they are likely to have many ups and downs. Coming to terms with the infidelity of a loved one is far from a quick process. You need to accept that for the relationship to work you have to give space to process what has happened. If you feel annoyed by the way your partner is acting, leave them alone for a while. Criticizing them or telling them to get over that issue will just make things worse.
Attend couple’s counseling. Committing to counseling is a good way to show your partner how important the success of your relationship is to you. A counselor is not there to tell you how to conduct your relationship or to cast opinion on your infidelity. In fact, many couples benefit from having an unknown third party to act as mediator.
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